The Challenge of Forgiveness

The Bhagavad Gita, Chapter 2, verse 50, states: The wise man lets go of all results whether good or bad, and is focused on the action alone. Yoga is skill in action.

I practice yoga and I teach yoga. I try to live yoga in the reality of a 2011 society and today I wanted to choke the living you-know-what out of my boss.

“I was done wrong” I kept saying to myself on the drive home. I decided to take a long route back after grabbing a soul settling cup of hot tea to reflect on what had just happened at work, I was accused in front of my peers of a triviality that did not reflect the necessity of the big picture. In fact, if let alone, would not have mattered to anyone at all.

William Blake once wrote a letter to the gentleman who had commissioned four watercolours from him, but deplored the result. ‘…that What is Grand is necessarily obscure to Weak Men that which can be made Explicit to the Idiot is not worth my care.’ I couldn’t agree more. I’m not at work 60 hours a week, with pay for 40, for the pleasure of verbal abuse or the small size of a paycheque. I’m there because I choose to be. Plain and simple. I like it. I was given the position I carry because of my expertise and skills, not because I enjoy knee chopping verbal abuse from both ends of the totem pole. So where does forgiveness come into play here? I’ll explain.

The practices of yoga are guided by many ancient scriptures of which the Bhagavad Gita and the Yoga Sutras are highlighted. A sort of “read these books the most for the best results” club. I did. The question of why they keep calling yoga a practice remains slightly forward in the back of my mind. Yoga, and the practices of, contain Eight Limbs, two of which have practical relevance to living a balanced and harmonious life if adopted. The Yamas and Niyamas each have their own subsections breaking down the art of living in the 20th century to Restraint or Conduct to Avoid and Observance. Today I observed the restraint I had to have to keep me from choking the you-know-what out of my boss. There. I feel better. I think. To be honest, that was the key; observance. When the situation was full on, I observed many emotions like anger and sadness, while defence mechanisms rose to epic proportions. I almost called Stephen Harper knowing he could buy me a weapon of “boss destruction” and it would come out of my taxes. I tried verbally to defend what I thought was right, but ego and power position prevailed. I’m only a minion in a managerial role. And yes, I do have a business card that states that. I don’t live the card, but I do live who I know I am after all these years.

Pouring over Observance and Restraint I laugh at all the possibilities, Ahimsa, to avoid all forms of violence or injury to self or others. I only had a glass of wine with dinner, it’s Friday night and I still want to choke my boss. Observance seems to encapsulate more of what happened today so Santosha, the practice of Contentment with oneself seems more appropriate. If I have any more wine I’ll be content with just choking and not include verbal abuse. I’m learning you see. Saucha the practice of Purity of Thought worked for a while and combined with several methods of torturing my boss would take me to Tapas, the practice of disciplines with understanding of self-development. As a manager can I then suggest to one of my employees that they choke my boss and not verbally abuse him?

You see what we want to. If we choose to keep the driving force inside us, the bitterness for revenge will only eat us up, stress us out and not teach us anything that will help us move forward as a human being with a spiritual mind. With no apology from my boss I choose to forgive. I am the wiser.

Just a little choke?

Learn to forgive and forget.

Love, CY

The Boots

Above is a picture of my new cowboy boots and I must say they are exquisite.

When my daughter Sarah was young I bought my first pair on a whim from Aldo in the Toronto Eaton Centre.  I loved them so much that when the soles wore out I had them re-soled, then wore them till they burst.  I wanted a new pair ever since.

As life moved in different directions, I forgot about the feelings of owning them and what they meant to me.  Important or not, I was certainly not hung up on the ego ownership of them.  I liked the fit and how they felt on my feet as I walked.

I’ve always considered myself to be “a little bit cowboy”.  As a youngster had a cowboy hat with a whistle attached and a holster.  I remember holding the fake gun up and looking at the two halves of plastic that never completely met properly.  It didn’t matter, I played the games anyway.  I’m not sure if I ever asked for boots, but feel my subconscious knew what was missing to complete the package, aside from the horse.

Adding to this I like the outdoors, dirt and farming.  (One day soon will take a horseback vacation with my girls in western Canada.)  It all makes sense.  It’s no secret either the boys from Blue Rodeo are my kind of music and whatever other country music, including Taylor Swift, touches my soul.  I feel my connection to the earth when I hear their tunes.

Cowboy shirts just secure the fact.  (I do have great taste in good cowboy shirts too.)  Does it make sense to say, if you wear something you like and it looks good on while making you feel comfortable, it’s probably made for you and you should be wearing it?  Wearing a cowboy shirt for me completes a right of passage.  Back then the air was pure and food was good.  Much was hard to come by.  Life was so much different.  I’m sure I was a cowboy in a past life.

Presently, I’m bridging my present connection to the past by wearing my boots.  The smell of quality leather grounds me in the here and now.  While wearing them I feel connected to a part of me that understands my decision to own a pair.  I can almost feel my boots in the stirrups while riding my horse and surveying the rolling hills before me as the land stretches as far to the horizon as the eye can see.  People worked hard for that land.  They fought and died for it.

My boots are also significant because of the time I waited patiently for them.  A story for another time perhaps, but I waited over 20 years for my new pair never forgetting how much I wanted a new pair to love.  The lessons from this are bigger than life itself, as you can imagine.  I would be happy to share them with you while wearing my new cowboy boots. Yeehaw! ~CY

It’s Only a Cup of Tea

Twice a day I go out for tea.  It’s simple really, because tea refills my energy cup.  The moments spent with a cup of tea ground me back to reality as I take time for myself.  Today didn’t seem to be the day though.

I buy tea from the same place twice a day.  I usually see the same woman, greet her with a smile and call her by name while I order.  Each time I have my work shirt on which also has my name on it.  Today I visited, ordered my tea, the usual way, and excitedly walked back to work with it.  It was coffee.  I began to think.  I watched as a small bubble of anger begin to surface up.  It was not about the anger this time, but the lesson given to me to be shared with you, my friends.

This lesson was about being present.  In the morning meeting with my staff I shared this story with them because I care deeply for the youth of today.  I wanted them to see, along with understanding this lesson for their life toolbox.  I told them about the frequency of my visits to get tea,  the fact that I choose to make contact with the serving staff and, while I’m there, thanking them for what they do for me.  I make a point of making eye contact along with sharing and relating to them as I do everyone else, as we are all equal.   I connect with them out of respect and love, as we should, with other human beings who cross our path daily.  “How can they not notice or remember me?” I wondered.

I related this message to their jobs and their lives, suggesting they take the time to think and listen for a moment to their customers, because they also have a story that we need to hear.  “We have no more time than the present moment.  The past has already happened and you cannot ever get it back.  The future will happen no matter what you do and may not be the outcome you were hoping for”, I said to them.  I reiterated suggesting they practice this today while with their customers.   All day long staff approached me thanking me, wanting to add their thoughts to the discussion.  It made them think about their lives and the deep meaning it has.  This lesson began to help un-groove what we routinely say and do with people all day long.  It will enhance their lives as they slip from the fog into awakened beings, thought moving with their every step in life.

I was given a great lesson, a Universal lesson, which I was able to also bestow upon others today.  Something I care to do every day of my waking life, as I strive to live it better and happier.  Learning as I go and sharing with my children, family, friends and colleagues.  This lesson is not over either.  I encourage you to share it with everyone awakening them to life.

There have never seen more cups of tea delivered to my desk as there was today! ~ with love, CY

When We’re Connected

Have you ever had lyrics, poetry, songs or creative inspiration of your own come into your head when you’re in the middle of doing dishes, raking leaves, driving, eating a favorite meal or just doing something sedentary you’ve done many times before?  When it was over did you feel you had been away for some time only to realize it was seconds?  Did it feel like a dream while you were awake and leave you with a feeling there is more out there than what we realize?  Did the moment leave you feeling bliss inside and out?  We’ve all had these moments in our lives, some more than others, and on a regular basis.

The practice of Ayerveda calls this sattva, moments of purity, absolute wisdom and the feeling of harmony, bliss and contentment.  It’s the principle of balance.  Sattva gives rise and awareness to our senses.  It will certainly make you question who we really are on this earth.  These moments also have the incredible power to heal us.  As one of the three universal gunas (sattva, rajas, tamas), sattva is the boss man that allows us to perceive so clearly and purely that when all is clear liberation will occur.  A single profound moment will show you the absolute differences in clarity and perception from your everyday thinking and enough truth you’ll want to act on it.

Doing the dishes this morning:
In our lives it seems so much is broken
In our lives there seems so much despair
In our lives it seems so much is spoken
And there’s no one there to care.

While walking in a beautiful mature forest:
It came to me a message
A moment in the breeze
From all around the earth
And filtered by the trees

In these times of connectedness we’re taken away from the mundane and operating on auto-pilot while our minds are journeying.  But journeying to where?  These moments are proof of who we are, spiritual beings in a human body.  One.  We are the true essence and qualities of the person standing next to us.  More on that later… ~CY

Too Funny!

A friend sent me the following cartoon and I found it far too funny not to share.  ENJOY! ~CY

HUGS

“Are there hugs like that out there in the real world?” I was asked one morning by my friend Erica. “They’re rare.” I replied. I hugged two more people just to be sure.

Many people hug and many people embrace. When guys hug they lean into each other careful not to let any other body part touch and pat each other on the back several times before quickly letting go. There’s so much room between them a small child could ride a bicycle through. I swear some of them then turn around afterwards to see if anyone saw them. When women hug they warmly embrace and even take a moment to pause further and before letting go either hold onto the waist or the arms of the other person and smile while complimenting them on their hair. They even touch the hair knowing that they’re not invading any personal space. They also don’t look around like the guys do. Why the differences in hugs I wonder?

We ALL love touch and benefit from it therapeutically. By touching someone we care, and have regard for, we convey love and compassion. By doing so, we ourselves let down our guard and become open and vulnerable. This is a valuable lesson for ourselves in this world. We all want to be loved, accepted and understood. A sincere hug has the ability to convey that.

Many of you may have already heard of Amma, “The “Hugging Saint” who travels the world hugging and embracing millions of people. To-date her efforts have significantly impacted millions of lives and continue to do so. Not only through hugs, but through financial aid as well. I encourage you to visit her website www.amma.org.

Once a press reporter asked Amma how was it possible for her to embrace each and every one in the same loving way, even if they were diseased or unpleasant. Amma replied, “When a bee hovers over a garden of varied flowers, what it beholds is not the difference between the flowers but the honey within them. Similarly Amma sees the same Supreme Self in each and every one.”

As Dr. Jane Goodall, while presenting Amma with the 2002 Gandhi-King Award for Non-violence said “She stands here in front of us. God’s love in a human body.” For the past 35 years Amma has dedicated her life to the uplifting of suffering humanity through the simplest of gestures – an embrace. In this intimate manner Amma had blessed and consoled more than 25 million people throughout the world.

Ask yourself this, “Would I or someone else give me a hug ever so lovingly?” You know, the kind of hug that “boosts” your energy, because the hug was really meant to be a hug. And what a word. Three insignificant letters when put together make a verb, and when put into action, can change the world. Think of what you feel when you hug, and what you exchange when you hug. The texture of the energy when your inhale reaches that peak before the clearing breath of the exhale. It’s the warmth of the other person, the closeness that’s shared. So close, sometimes you can feel the contours of their body against yours. The sighs, the words and sounds that follow the initial grasp as bodies fold into one. Eyes closed the world goes away. The moment IS all about the hug, the quiet healer. ~ CY

Olympic Gold for the Human Spirit

There we were, a very large group of enthusiastic hockey fans, patriots, friends, lovers and drunks completely enthralled in one present moment; a gold medal hockey game.

Thrilled with what was happening here I decided to take the position of the observer for a moment and was able to see an actual truth revealed, a duality between what was and wasn’t. It wasn’t the game or the energy of the group. It wasn’t the woman running around getting her Canadian t shirt autographed by everyone in the bar while she painted red maple leafs on their faces. It wasn’t the tall drunk guy standing next to me weaving side to side while clenching his libation tightly spouting hockey statistics in my right ear while I carefully listened to the real game in my left ear. It certainly wasn’t the guy who openly admitted with a roar that he was from the US and took a lot of ribbing but in the end was warmly embraced, made a pile of new friends and will be going home with one hell of a story as to where he was for the gold medal game. It wasn’t even the Japanese man that carefully removed his hat and stood proudly while the national anthem played. It was much more than this.

It was the fact that millions of people across many nations were brought together with a single focus: a hockey game!

What amazed me the most about this gathering was that this group was living in a present moment of awareness displaying so much outward use of energy and for a sustained period of time which spawned a second question; if we can devote this kind of energy and focus to a hockey game, what could we do as a collective to solve some of the bigger pressing issues of our society? We could really score with children’s poverty or taking the time to cook a nutritious meal for the senior that lives next door. If everyone at the pub donated the time and/or money that they spent that day on society issues once a year change would evolve faster than at the present rate.

My presence that day was validated by the collective of the human spirit. It moved me and at times I felt euphoric as screams of joy followed by hugs all around came in waves as the score mounted. We all felt safe in the sacred space we shared because we allowed ourselves to be opened up and vulnerable. Sex, race, gender, age; it all didn’t matter because at the end of the day we all knew each other by face. ~ CY

The Seed

The seed is known for its humble beginnings. For its journey to be successful the seed needs ideal conditions to grow with time to flourish. I’m inspired and humbled by the genetic information contained in the seeds of the awe-inspiring Sitka Spruce (Picea sitchensis), of the Pacific Northwest reaching skyward at 70 meters tall and 5 meters across or the just as magnificent Coast Redwoods (Sequoia sempervirens and the subspecies of sequoiadendron including the Sequoiadendron giganticum), the world’s largest trees by volume touching the heavens at 50-85 meters and 5 meters across! The small seeds that grow these treasured gems contain all the information needed to complete this journey. This is how I feel it started for me.

I’m reminded of a very profound story when I think of trees. When something in our lives has left such an imprint and is thought of afterwards because the lessons from it keep emerging, one should share that story.

It was a warm spring day. The sun was shining. The snow was becoming a memory of the past. Our minds shift to summer fun as the heat of the sunshine touches our skin. Happiness envelops our whole body lifting our spirits as high as a hawk in flight. This is the seat of happiness I was sitting in, when I noticed a large orchard on both sides of the highway I was driving along. Besides the incredible size of the orchard, I was able to define the trees as apple trees. Hundreds of apple trees beyond my peripheral vision row upon row over the rolling fields.

My initial thoughts were; this orchard supplies a lot of apples to a lot of people, and the industrial sector for juicing, etc. The cost of operation to carry out this task is enormous. There is: picking and harvesting, shipping and handling, and all must be done in a timely manner so all the apples are harvested and get to markets, onto trucks and trains, then onto grocery store shelves. We’ve all had a farm fresh apple. We can appreciate the effort it takes to get the apples picked and delivered. The numbers in my head were staggering. The number of apples per tree, per orchard, equaled big dollars for the owner.

I wondered how old the orchard was. Had it been handed down generation to generation? The trees had large mature trunks and had probably bared fruit for a very long time. I was looking at a craft that had been carried through centuries of time, a lesson in sustainability. The vastness and scope of the orchard was beginning to overwhelm me in thought. The possibilities seemed endless.

The genetic information for every plant and tree is in the tiny seed that we plant and here were hundreds of trees. A miracle was being reworked over and over, and I was witnessing this!

As with anything in our life, once we let our thoughts go, something comes in to fill the void. Not too far into the orchard, close to the highway I was traveling on, was a man trimming the apple trees. His years of wisdom together with his knowledgeable hands helped shape the trees to produce the maximum amount of fruit each tree could bare. He was a guide for the final product and mimicking divine creation through the love of his hands. As I watched this man practice his craft with such care and precision, it dawned on me; every tree bares many fruits. Within each fruit there are many seeds that can sustain the growth of another tree, or an offspring of the parent tree. Hundreds of trees were producing thousands of apples with tens of thousands of seeds and one man was responsible for the maximum propagation of fruit. Here was a very powerful man indeed, and the trees were working with him.

Spring and its warmth signal rebirth to the apple trees. The genetic memory of the tree and initially the seed energetically pushes new growth outwards to the branches as they sit reaching towards the sun giving them an individual opportunity to thrive and grow like all the others. If you’ve ever noticed spring leaves, grasses and shoots have a unique green color as they have not experienced full synthesis yet. They look succulent and immature in shape and are recognized as images of their parents. After the flowering, and with further growth, the apples start to appear signaling the latter stages of the growth cycle and the life of the fruit. The skin of the apple, its unique identifying covering and protection, has sat in the sun since birth absorbing its energy while inside the flesh, vitamins and nourishment were building the wisdom of the information in the original seed. Seeds are formed to create new life, if needed, giving the fruit an opportunity to sustain itself.

When we bite into a fresh crispy apple the flavor bursts forward in our mouth, tickling the sensations of our tongue with sweet and sour notes, and our ability to feel alive through our senses.

Once picked and eaten, the cycle continues as the apple nourishes our body and mind, sustaining us. The cycle is almost over, letting us know that all good things do come to an end, until we pick up another apple and bite into its beauty.

May this story of trees resonate with you spawning further thought and discussions. Did you see the life of an apple tree and its fruit may be similar to ours? If you have, you have then seen and heard what the trees told me that day. It all starts with a seed. ~ CY